I met Toni through some of my other friends in our sorority, but we became a lot closer my sophomore year when we both lived in house. She is a junior human development and family sciences major with an emphasis in child development and education. I can always count on her when I need extra help with anything or when I need a movie buddy. She always gives the best advice and is willing to study with me. She is one of my only friends who has continued dating her boyfriend from high school, so she was able to offer an interesting perspective on college dating.
- Are you currently dating someone?
Yes, I am.
- When was your previous relationship? (Or the last time you went on a date)
In high school – junior year and half of senior year of high school, so about a year and a half
- Why did it end?
I just stopped… I guess… I fell out of love. I wasn’t feeling it anymore; it was nothing he did I just wasn’t feeling it, so I ended it.
- How long was your longest relationship? When was that?
It is my current relationship and it has been two years and… *she stops to count* three months.
- What do you think are some of the differences between dating in high school versus dating in college?
From my experience in high school, I got to see him every day and I could see him basically whenever I wanted to. College it’s hard because we both go to different schools and we have to plan when we see each other, and that can be really difficult. But, it definitely has made us stronger.
I think we’ve made it work because we both agree on everything, most things. Like we’ll… I don’t know… we agree on when we want to see each other and we communicate well. So, communication is key.
- How would you describe the dating scene here at Mizzou, from an outside perspective?
It’s really interesting actually, because, for me, I don’t go out as much… Like, especially freshman and sophomore year everyone else would go out to mingle and find a guy and I just went out to kind of hang out with my friends, so I didn’t go out as often. And, it’s interesting to see everyone else trying to find a guy and how it doesn’t work out a lot for some people. It’s definitely a lot harder, especially if you’re meeting someone at, like, a bar. I feel like you, well it’s different for everyone, need to get to know a person a little better than just hooking up and then going form there. I’ve seen, as I walk around campus a lot of couples, so I guess that good *laughs*.
- How would you describe the dating scene for people age 18-22?
I think it’s more hookups here at Mizzou, I mean, like I said, obviously I’ve seen a lot of people that are in relationships and I take a lot of relationship classes and, so like, we take questionnaires and surveys about who’s in a relationship and who’s not and a decent amount of people are in long-term relationships, but from what I hear and overhear a lot of it is just hookups. A lot of it is really not intentional either, it’s just like ‘Oh, that didn’t work out, so it’s in my past no.’
- How do you see your friends normally meet people?
Usually either through another friend and they’re mainly in fraternities, so a lot of my friends have met guys through fraternities either through pairings or meeting at a party or sometimes at bars. A couple of my friends have boyfriends meeting them that way.
- Would you say that most of your friends have found long-term relationships at school? Why do you think that is?
I wouldn’t say most of my friends, but I have a couple that are currently in a long-term relationship, starting in college.
I don’t know, I guess you’re in college so you want to find the right person, so you don’t want to stay in a long-term relationship if you don’t think it’s right, so I feel like that’s why a lot of them haven’t stayed committed, because they don’t feel it’s right. You’re approaching the time in your life when you want to settle down, not settle down but if you’re dating someone for a long time you want to see them in your future, so I feel like that is a determining point for most of my friends and why they break up or don’t.
- If you could tell your freshman self something about dating in college what would it be?
Definitely explore, but to find what you like or don’t like and then you’ll find out, but be careful. Don’t go crazy and get in trouble and screw everything up for your college career for a boy that’s just stupid. If you do end up being in a long-term relationship, I would say communication is key. If you guys don’t agree on things, talk about it. You don’t want to not be happy.